The three monkeys of Judgement Dave

Characters -> Sgt Smith

After a life in the military, Sgt Smith runs suburban survivalist centres training the middle classes to survive the coming catastrophic meltdown of society.

We don't know what form that catastrophe will take, but Sgt Smith can train you to survive no matter what.

- Do you know how to construct an emergency survival gazebo from just a copy of the Guardian?

- Can you splint a leg with nothing but al dente Tagliatelle?

- Do you know the minimum number of speciality extra-virgin olive oils you need to survive in the wilderness and still be able to enjoy a reasonable selection of tapas?

Sgt Smith can teach you all this - and more.


Please note that, for security reasons, we are not currently able to show pictures or film of Sgt Smith.